Sunday, May 9, 2010
Be present
I feel like I packed my day too much today and, as a result, did not feel present at any of the things. I went for a long bike ride with a friend. Then went to the mariner's game with another friend. Then went to work for a few hours. Part of it was I left the house at 9am and got home at 9pm. Interacted with a lot of people, did a lot of physical exercise, and didn't eat very much. I did great things today. It was a good day. But I really just didn't feel present at them. It kind of felt like I was watching myself do those things on some screen. Especially at work. I did not feel present when I was there. Which kind of feels like the worst part of it all. Because I want to be present for these kids. Do you ever have days like that? Where you just don't feel present? You're head is all over the place. Everywhere but where you are at that moment. I don't like it. Cause I was looking forward to the things I did today. I have been excited about them for a while. And then I did them and I wasn't present for them. I was thinking about many other things. I missed the experience that was right in front of me happening live for things in my head that didn't and don't matter at all. I hate that.
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